Christlife Posture: Loving Like Jesus

Topic: Juggling Old and New Relationships

Suggested Approach: Choose 1 thing from each of the three boxes

OR Choose 1 from Media or Reflection + 1 from Scripture 

Media Excursions (Watch/read/listen and be ready to discuss Q's)


  • FaceTime (web image) Connecting with your closest friends from college might look like this. What seems beneficial about that? What seems hazardous about this for your friendships?

Video Clip


  • I will be your friend (Michael W Smith) This is a great song about friendship. Realistically, how many people can you offer this level of friendship to? How many of your friends from college live in close proximity to you? How has distance limited the number of friends you can give and receive this kind of friendship with?


Reflection Options  

Journal  (Reflect on one or more of these questions)

  • How do you feel about allowing friendships to change over time? What friendships are you trying to hold on to that might be better to let fade? What friendships are you neglecting that are worth holding on to?

  • Create or look at a calendar (month).  Note your current commitments on it.  What spaces do you have for keeping in touch with old friends? How do you want to be intentional in using those spaces?

  • What are your expectations for your friendships from the past?  What do you think your friends expect from your friendship, especially in regard to frequency of contact? Lift your expectations, their expectations, and your current commitments up to the Lord.  Write a prayer, asking Him to help you order your life and your relationships.

Quote Interaction  (Agree, disagree or otherwise engage with the quote/quotes)

  • Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend - or a meaningful day. (Dalai Lama)

  • The friendship that can cease has never been real." (Saint Jerome)

  • Few delights can equal the mere presence of someone we utterly trust.  (George MacDonald)

  • True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity, before it is entitled to the appellation. (George Washington)

  • It is well for us that, amidst all the variableness of life, there is One whom change cannot affect; One whose heart can never alter, and on whose brow mutability can make no furrows. (Charles Spurgeon)

Reading and reflection on Shaping The Journey of Emerging Adults

  • Read “Teach Specific Skills for Healthy Relating” (pp. 158-160).  How has trying to stay connected to past friendships while investing in new friendships increased your sense of “relational skimming”? Is the uncomfortableness of developing or deepening new friendships a factor in relying on old friendships?  How do you feel about that? Which skills might help you deepen the new friendships you are making?

 Explore Scripture

Meditate on one or more of the following passages. Always look them up in context.  Take some time to really explore the verse in relation to this topic.  Make note of any insights you gain that might help you in times of transition in your friendships.  Make a note of what you discover to share later.  See "Learn More About Ways to Study Scripture" below for help in getting the most out of the verse.

  • Proverbs 17:17; 18:24

  • Proverbs 27:10

  • Isaiah 43:18-19

  • I Corinthians 13:11

  • Galatians 6:7

  • Friendship of Paul and Barnabas--Act 9:27, 13, 15