Reflection Options  

Journal  (Reflect on one or more of these questions)

• Make a list of benefits and costs for living with your parents.  How can you show appreciation for the benefits? What can you do to address the costs?  If you have a good relationship with your parents, ask them what the costs and benefits are for them as well? 

• Do some self-reflection on the ways that moving home has affected your self-perception.  How has this move hurt your view of yourself as a functioning adult? Submit any fears or insecurities you are facing to the Lord. 

• What is your plan for moving out into financial and living independence? Write it out and include specific measurable goals whenever possible.  Share with a friend or mentor and ask them to check in with you on that plan at various intervals. 

Quote Interaction (Agree, disagree or otherwise engage with the quote/quotes)

• Every Christian family ought to be a little church, consecrated to Christ and wholly influenced and governed by His Laws.  (Jonathan Edwards) 

• The family is wonderful, but unless we understand the family in the context of the triune God who is magnifying and manifesting His glory in the world and painting the picture of it through this union that we call the family, then we are selling it short and we are not seeing it for what it really is and we are limiting our capacity to enjoy it and our capacity to glorify God through it as well. (Voddie Baucham)

• The family is supposed to be our training ground in this loving authority.  It is a “ramping-up” place that God has given us to learn love, respect, honor, obedience, and trust, in order to prepare us for relating to others and ultimately to God Himself. (Mark Dever) 

• “When you're safe at home you wish you were having an adventure; when you're having an adventure you wish you were safe at home.” Thornton Wilder

Reading and reflection on Shaping The Journey of Emerging Adults: 

• Start on the paragraph that begins, “Present cultural norms” (pp. 28-29) and “Relational Instability” (pp. 31-33). Emerging Adult: What kinds of support do you currently depend on your parents to provide? How does that affect the way you want to or feel you should relate to them? What is your own ideal timetable for becoming independent (financially and relationally)?  MENTOR: How did you become independent of your parents?

• Read “Who am I? Relationships” (pp. 111-112).  If you have begun to redefine your relationship with your parents, what about it has felt scary or disruptive or confusing for you? Which aspects of the way they relate to you sends the message that you aren’t an adult yet?  Which aspects have helped you gain confidence as an adult?

• Read “Negotiating Parental Relationships” (pp. 145-146). What was it like to return home--especially in regard to freedom/independence vs. parental standards? Are there any cultural expectations that make it easier or harder for you?  In what ways would you like your parents to understand you better? MENTOR: if you have had a young adult move back home, how did you navigate the changes in relationship?