Christlife Posture: Loving Like Jesus

Topic: Pursuing New Friendships

Suggested Approach: Choose 1 thing from each of the three boxes

OR Choose 1 from Media or Reflection + 1 from Scripture 

Media Excursions      (Watch/read/listen and be ready to discuss Q's)


  • Charles I (Van Dyck) Does anything about this painting seem strange to you? Do you ever search for friends who are a reflection of yourself? Contrast the idea of loving your neighbor as yourself and loving your neighbor because he or she is like yourself.


  • Zero Percent (Bansky) What do you think this graffiti artist is trying to communicate with this poster?

Video Clip

  • The Importance of Friendship and Community (CBN) What qualities of friendship stand out to you from these interviews?  Are you that kind of friend to others?  Do a bit of self evaluation.  What are the things you need to work on?

  • Friendship Algorithm (Big Bang Theory) This funny clip brings up the question of how much of making a new friend is “science” and how much is “art” or happens spontaneously.  What do you think the balance is between those two methods? Where does Jesus fit in our pursuit of making new friends?

  • Skit: Wash My Feet (Onetimeblind) What kinds of comparisons do you tend to make when getting to know others? How does this come out in your conversations? What kind of hindrance can it be in making friends in a godly way?


  • Every Minute (Sara Groves) This song talks about the preciousness of friendship in a relationally disconnected culture.  Which images are appealing to you? How do you think you can proactively create moments like that with others?


  • Making New Friends in College (Hansen)  What experiences for engaging in diverse community are available to you on your campus? How can you be more intentional in finding ways to experience the richness of the body of Christ at your college?


Reflection Options  

Journal   (Reflect on one or more of these questions)

  • Make a list of what you would like in a friend.  Now evaluate how you are doing in those same qualities.

  • What are the best and worst starts you have had in trying to make friends? What was the ultimate result?  

  • Have you ever had a poor first impression of a person that you later became good friends with? How does this encourage you about potential friendships you might make at college?

Quote Interaction  (Agree, disagree or otherwise engage with the quote/quotes)

  • "To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.” George MacDonald

  • "Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’"  C.S. Lewis

  • "When you choose your friends, don’t be short-changed by choosing personality over character." W. Somerset Maugham

Reading & Reflection from the book, Shaping The Journey of Emerging Adults:

  • Read the story of Emilio and Roberto (pp. 152-154). Has there ever been a time when you struggled to make friends? How easy was it for you to blame others? What did you learn about your own behavior that helped you get through that phase?

  • Mentor: Read the section on Friendships (pp. 146-148). Use that section to think of at least three questions you want to ask the young adult about how he or she is experiencing the challenge of friendship in their context.

Explore Scripture

Meditate on one or more of the following passages. Always look them up in context.  Take some time to really explore the verse in relation to this topic.  What insights can you find related to what to look for in a friendship or what to be in a friendship?  Make a note of what you discover to share later.  See "Learn More About Ways to Study Scripture" below for help in getting the most out of the verse.

  • Proverbs 13:20

  • Proverbs 17:9

  • Proverbs 17:17 & 27:17

  • Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

  • Luke 6:31

  • Luke 11:5-10

  • I Corinthians 10:24

  • I Corinthians 15:33